Post 38: Mr. DJ III
The Scene: My hometown
The Attire: Cut-Off Shorts, Hometown T-Shirt with two 3-year-old twins in tow
The Meeting: This gentleman and I have been communicating for several months via telephone and facetime (due to the COVID-19 climate) + our respective schedules + my international travel which created a wedge in our opportunity to connect physically.
The Environment: Walking and playing with the twins through the neighborhood where I grew up.
Our Story: Pushing myself, I engage differently. I decide to express myself calmly and directly without holding my emotion (which begins to eat at me intrinsically). I expressed to this gentleman (on several occasions) that I feel dismissed when he gives me his word that he will do something and doesn’t follow through.
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His words, “I will call you back.”
His actions, he doesn’t.
In week 2 of him not calling me back, I decide to text him, “Sending you positive energy on this Memorial Day! Hope you are well Mr. DJ”
Response: 365 in the BUILDING!!! Thank you kindly. I receive that and needed that. Hope you’re doing great”
Me: It’s been a while … is everything ok with you?
Him: Ehhh
It will be soon
Things just have to run its course
Me: What can I do to support you?
Him: This check-in was perfect. I appreciate it
Me: If you need an ear, I am here …
40 minutes later, my phone rings … I am running with the twins but rush to pick up the phone and to say, “I am in the midst of playtime (as I was on the street with cars flying by)” – I ask, “can I call you back?” He says, “No worries, I am heading to play golf”
I said, “OK” he said, “I will call you later.”
I asked the clarifying question, “later today or later in life?”
He laughed and said, “That’s hilarious … Later tonight Cherrod.”
I said ok and we hung up.
Then this text conversation:
“Hey 365!!! … hope you’re doing well. I decided not to call you back yesterday not because I didn’t want to talk to you but because when I did want to talk and share, you couldn’t because you were distracted by 3 yr olds (totally understandable). I appreciate you offering to listen … I really do. We will talk soon for sure”
I am dumbfounded and done!
Next day text, “Good Morning D365. Hope your day goes great and amazing.”
Me: “Thank you for your text Mr. DJ and praying the same for you.”
Him: Thanks
Our time: Ended.
I never heard back from him and made the executive decision that my time is too precious to entertain this level of selfishness and pettiness.
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Note to Self: When you feel fundamentally disrespected, do what you need to do to care for you – you don’t need to be mean but know and understand your value.
Shout Out to Men: Consider your words: think before you text. Filtering helps!
Question: How do you react to others’ level of selfishness?